Thursday, March 15, 2007

Candy Time!!!

LOT #1
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  • 65 chipboard pieces
  • 5 heavyweight chipboard caosters
  • 75 various SU colors Cuttlebug slide die cuts
  • 10 scallop mega oval punches
  • Scrap metal pack


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LOT #2
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  • 69 chipboard pieces
  • 6 sheets patterned paper (2 of each)
  • 28 Sizzix slide mount die cuts
  • Lots of Cuttblebug Asterik die cuts
  • 5 Gardenbella, 6 Cakeabella, and 8 Flopsy images (stamped with Stazon on watercolor paper)



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Alright, so here it is! It's my biggest blog candy thus far. This time around and I have 2 prize lots. I am also going to hand pick the winners. Here are the details:

*You musy be a U.S. or Canada resident to be able to get the goodies (sorry!).
*I want to hear something funny!!!!! I love to laugh! My kids crack me up all the time and I am an avid movie watcher! Just leave a comment that includes a joke or funny story (if it's a funny story, I want it to be about you and not taken off the web please) or even a funny photo you have taken or been in.
*Please make sure you leave your email somewhere in your post so I know how to contact you if you win.
*You must give me complete adoration and I must be raised upon your crafting pedestal! Alright, so that's a little far fetched but can't blame a girl for trying huh?

I will close this on Monday at noon when I will announce the winner! I can't wait to see what all of you come up with and hope you can make me ALMOST pee my pants. {grin}

51 comments:

Nancy said...

WOW... that is CANDY!!!!

My funny story happened last year at a not so funny time. We had congregated in my home town right after the sudden death of my dad. My oldest sister and her daughter, my husband and I and our two sons, and my Mom were at a local restaurant for breakfast. They were busy that morning so we had the three "kids" sitting at one table and the rest of us across the aisle at another table. My sister and I, when we are stressed, turn to humour so we were joking around, having fun and generally misbehaving... my youngest son (at the time he was 9) is rather sensitive... he starts to cry.... and suddenly shouts out... "I think my parents are weire... because they ARE!". Well, that sent us all into hysterics. The poor kid was so embarassed.

For his birthday, my sister gave him a t'shirt that says "I didn't choose my parents"... but he won't let me tell anyone why she bought him that one!

Cheers
nancy.elrick@gmail.com

Nancy said...

k

Crystal said...

Ok - here's an oldie but goodie that I heard on today's Today show. How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one but the lightbulb REALLY has to want it. Seriously, I love your blog...check it every day. Thanks for sharing your art and talent. We also share a common love for Chris Daughtry. He's from only about 30 miles away from me here in NC. When Chris was voted off of AM I swore I would never watch it again...and I haven't. It was probably the best thing that could have happened to him though. Thanks, Crystal email: crystal.nixon@mci.com

Kelly A. Battles said...

Awesome blog candy! :)

Ok, so here's my story (probably rated "PG"):
My daughter (who was three at the time), came to me panty-less and with tears in her eyes. She was crying and I could hardly understand what she was saying. Finally, she blurted out, "Mommy, my butt's on backwards!" Without trying to make her even MORE self-conscious, I said, "No, honey. It's not." But she insisted that it was. I asked her why, and she said, "Look!" (pointing to her "front girl parts"). I had to explain what each of her parts were for at that point, but I'll leave out my explanation to keep from embarrassing her too much one day AND to keep it "clean." HA HA (Really is a true story.)

While I'm on this kick, I figure I could tell you another funny:
My nickname in 3rd grade was Michael Jackson!! Why??? Our power went out one night and I was doing homework by candles. When I leaned near one, my hair caught on fire. This was the same year that Michael Jackson caught his hair on fire during the filming of a Pepsi commercial -- hence the nickname.

Ok, so maybe my first story was funnier, but just imagine being a 3rd grade GIRL with the nickname Michael Jackson (back when he was much more masculine). ha ha!

kellybstampin@yahoo.com
www.kellybstampin.blogspot.com

BlogHore said...

To the beautiful Heidi. Just to let you know how much I adore you....I even named my cat after you. Truly. Her name is Heidi and she is 9 years old TODAY! How about that? Well, actually, my then 7 year old named her. When he came up with the name I was very impressed. I LOVE the name Heidi. When I asked him how he had come up with it, he answered "Cuz she likes to hide alot". LOL!! In his mind, her name would have been spelt Hidey (I guess). How's that. Adoration AND a funny story all rolled into one.

stefanie said...

Great blog candy!

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal after they at a clown?
"Did that taste funny to you"?

I know, I know, it's a flopper but hey! I love it!

Have a great day!

Janet B said...

One funny story I can tell is when my son was about 3 and he was exploring the riverbank while the rest of us were fishing next to him. Of course, being a boy, he found the muddiest spot ever. He got his boot stuck on the river bank, and I had to go and dig him out, and try not to fall into the river. We were both covered in mud from head to toe! Where was his Dad and brother? Heading off to the car, so as not to be seen with us!

One joke for you (You ned to know about Pokemon) : How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You Poke him on. (Pokemon)

I love your work. You are SO talented!

Thanks, Janet B

April said...

Okay...I've got a doozie. When I was about 12 or 13 my little sister at the time was quite the crack up. Her cat was having babies and my little sister (Heidi) kept saying..."She's having contraptions!!" And of course when one of the little kittens came out she called the umbilical cord an extension cord. One of the funniest things I've ever seen. RIGHT HEIDI???????? :D Thought I would turn a funny story around on the blogger!! :) I love you anyway though! :)

dd2njoy said...

OMG HEIDI, this is some CANDY I don't want to miss.Here goes my story...My godson's mother is having a second child,so Gavin which he turned 5 yest. was acting up so his mom told him your little brother or sister can see you acting up you know. So he says how can he see me,mom replies through my bellybutton.Gavin went to the belly,pulled down mom's pant and started talking to his new sibling. I just found that so cute and funny...Kids say the darnest things!!Have a good day!!craftscar@hotmail.com Canada

Jennifer said...

My funny story: One year for Valentine's day while my (now) husband and I were dating he bought me a card that was written in Spanish. Neither one of us could read Spanish so on the inside of the card he wrote "For Valentine's Day I wanted to say exactly what you wanted to hear. Now we can just pretend that this says whatever you want it to. Heck, I'll never know the difference!" The funniest part is that on the BACK of the card it gave the translation for what the card really said. Of course my husband overlooked this part. The translation said, "Happy Valentines Day to my HUSBAND. I'm really glad we found each other...Knowing your sense of direction, it's downright amazing!" We had a really good laugh over this and I still enjoy telling that story!!

And, for the adoration part...Heidi you are so great! SO generous!! SO thoughtful to share your candy with all of your admirers! Seriously though, I truly do enjoy your blog and check it everytime that I see your feed has been updated! Thanks for sharing your talent!!

L8ybug2 said...

My funny story has to do with the way you ended your blog. My daughter and I used to work at the same Pre-School and Day Care Center. One summer we worked together with the infants and toddlers. We all know how funny they can be sometimes. On this one particular day one of the kids did something really funny (I can't remember what it was) and we both started laughing. Well, things got a little out of hand and we laughed so hard that I litterly peed my pants. My daughter had to call my husband to bring me some dry ones. I had to sit in a chair so nobody could see my VERY wet pants. Luckily it was the end of the day and we just had one more parent to arrive. Needless to say, she took care of them......
~~Rita~~

tamimoreno said...

Wow - SWEET candy :-)
My funny story happened a few years ago. I'm not sure one can appreciate it in print - but I'll give it my best shot.
We had just moved into our house. We weren't used to the various creaks and noises a new house brings. My husband and I were falling asleep but not quite asleep yet when all of the sudden something flies into our room from the hallway and crashes. It appears to have been thrown from the hallway. Our kids were asleep and there was nobody else in the house, so we were convinced someone was robbing the house. I'm screaming - non-stop. I am sitting up in bed - screaming at the top of my lungs - WAY too afraid to move or make sure the kids are okay.
My husband? He is attempting to make a sound but it comes out as if he's under water and in like a grunting sound.

So now we're both "screaming" and making grunting noises. My husband has a baseball bat in his hand - but we are both frozen in fear - still in bed.
In the meantime, the kids have woken up and are asking if everything is okay.
Finally I find my voice and say "Everything's fine - go back to sleep". My husband is still frozen in fear. Yeah, everything is fine - both Mom and Dad are screaming in utter fear in the middle of the night. I'm sure I was convincing.
I'm not sure how long it took us to actually MOVE out of bed to find out what was going on.
What we saw fly across the room? A shirt that was hanging on a lamp the cat knocked over. The crash was from the light smacking the ground. No robber in the house.
The sad thing? It's not the first time.
A few years before that, we lived in another house. I was asleep in the living room when all of the sudden someone started trying to open the front door. I began screaming and my husband came running from the bedroom. The only thing he could find to pick up was a poker from the fireplace. The "robber" continued to slam on the door, attempting to open it. My husband is now standing at the door yelling at the mystery person on the other side of it. I have the kids "hidden" under the bed in our bedroom.
After several minutes, one of us finally braves looking outside.
There was no robber, of course. The wind had knocked the door off the hinges and the banging was from the wind blowing the screen door against the main door.
Sad thing? Neither one of us ever thought to call 911.
Needless to say - we don't panic as easily at night anymore.
Thanks for the contest-
Tami

Stick2home4school said...

Hi there Heidi! ;-)

My funny story just happened yesterday. We're all attending a wedding this Saturday and I of course have NOTHING to wear. I dragged the kids kicking and screaming to Kohl's with me to look for something. I found this really cute blouse that I liked, but unfortunately there were none in my size. Drew (my 7yo) who couldn't have been in a bigger hurry to get outta the store said, "Do you like that one Mom?" I said, "Yes son, but it's too big and they don't have any in my size." He pipes up REAL LOUD like, "Don't worry Mom, you can grow into it. Now let's go!"

There were about 4 ladies around us who died laughing. One said, "I was thinking how cute, he's helping his mom shop, and then he said that!" I had to explain to Drew that us grown up ladies are perfectly happy to get smaller, or sometimes even stay the same size...but there's never really a time when we wanna "grow into" our clothes! LOL 'Cept maybe for pregnancy. :D

As far as putting you on a "crafting pedestal", you're there, but please remember who got ya stamping in the first place! ;-)

Love ya,
Amy
stick2home4school@yahoo.com

Penny & Lisa said...

Love your blog! OK, on ocassion I have been known to throw out a damn or a sh*t, very quietly almost to myself when something goes wrong! (can you say that on here?) Anyway, I had given my daughter a pack of skittles and we were walking down the stairs - 3 yo. I hear her say damn. I told her that, that is not a nice word and she is not to use it again. She tells me well, I just said it because my candy fell. A couple pieces fell onto the floor out of her hand. I am thinking we have come to an understanding and she realizes that she is not supposed to repeat things she hears "big" people say. So we get to the bottom and she trips and the rest of the skittles fall to the floor out of the pack. "Sh*t" she says. I said, Logan I thought we had the understanding that you do not say words that aren't nice. She said well my candy fell again and you only told me not to say damn. Well, I could not go through ALL the bad words she couldn't repeat, so I called a truce and picked up the candies for her! :) I am very good about not using "big" words in front of her now! :) Happy Friday (almost!) Lisa K (lisa_keeffe@yahoo.com)

doverdi said...

Wow awesome candy.

When my son was about 2 we were in a restaurant while on vacation and he decided that he had to go to the bathroom. So I took him into the washroom and while we were in the stall, some lady went into the stall next to us. The next thing we heard was a "gas" sound and my son (sweet, little innocent thing that he was) hollers at the top of his lungs "eww, who farted". I'm trying to shush him and he kept hollering but mommy somebody farted. He wouldn't let it end so as soon as he finished we quickly left the bathroom. I don't know who the poor lady was that was in the stall next to us but it was a long time before she came out. lol

Kathy McD said...

Wow! THis is great stuff Heidi! My funny story happened this past fall when DH and I along with our son and DIL were on vacation in Gatlinburg. Our cabin in the mountain didn't have internet access, so neither son nor myself were able to log in to check email or our groups. After several days of withdrawal from the 'Net, as we got into the car to go to dinner, I turned to everyone and said "Be sure to log-in"...instead of buckle-up...needless to say...I won't be living that one down for a loooonnnnggggg time! LOL!

Dawn Mercedes said...

Here is a funny story...

A couple of weeks ago, my 7 year old DS was taking a shower in the master bath room. He was told to wash his hair. Well, he applied the shampoo to his hair and around his neck and shoulders. When my DH asked what are you doing? DS said, "It says 'Head&Shoulders.'" We got a kick out of that one!

Dawn Mercedes said...

Forgot to add:

dawnmercedes at hotmail dot com

Allison said...

Jeez...how much time you got? There was the time when I was in the Hearst Castle on a tour through the library and I had a thing for change (you know - the coin kind - don't ask me...I can't even blame this on youth since I was 29 at the time). So I pulled my sunglasses out of my pocket and I swear like twenty dollars in change flew all over this quiet library where the tour was taking place...my DH just shook his head.

Or the time I was looking at a house where the realtor just happened to be a local TV meterologist...I was a little taken aback when I saw him. Anyway, I was looking at the backyard and I wanted to see the back alley (I am convinced you can judge your neighbours by the state of the back alley). I opened the gate just slightly and their yappy small dog got out. (Needless to say, this dog was never let out since it never came back - they had left him in the backyard for the open house so that the lookie-loos wouldn't have to deal with him yapping at them.) Back to the story...the dog took off down the alley and out of sight! So for the next hour, on a very sunny hot day, this realtor/local TV meterologist and I ran all over the neighbourhood trying to catch him. We finally did (needless to say the open house was a fiasco) and my DH just shook his head...

One last one since I am on a roll (and I am not going for extra points here - I just know you have a twisted sense of humour!). When I had Tristan, I had an epidural early on in my labour (since he had to be induced and I had to have an antibiotics IV too). I was on my back for close to ten hours. A couple of hours after Tristan was born, a nurse came to tell me she was going to help me go to the bathroom in 15 minutes. Well I thought "No way, I can go pee on my own". So I got up, legs still frozen, and immediately fell on the floor. Well, it looked like there had been a homicide in that room! My DH just sat there laughing because he knew I was just being pig-headed and determined to do it on my own. The nurses ran in to see what the commotion was all about and thankfully did not give me crap since DH was having quite the little laugh-fest of his own. I did get the last laugh though since I threw him a towel and told him to clean up while the nurses dealt with me!

You see why I stay at home and only have "pretend friends"?

Jessica (jessrose21) said...

I think my cats are adorable and funny. One cat likes to sleep on top of the computer monitor. The problem is that she falls asleep so deeply that she's not aware of her surroundings and just rolls off the front, down the keyboard and onto the chair. I'll be in the other room and hear scrambling and crashing sounds so I'll run to make sure she's ok. She comes out sleepy-eyed and meowing and looking at me like, mommy what happened? And then I have to pick her up and cuddle her. She also likes to hang out on the bathroom counter and be the meet and greet at the bathroom door for anyone who comes in. Then she likes to try and get in your lap while you're doing your...uh, business. She's a goofball!
jessrose21@yahoo.com

loislane said...

Wow! How generous you are. My funny story happened quite a few years ago when my now 13 year old daughter was about 2. We were visiting my in-laws and DD bit her Uncle while they were wrestling around. Her grandma was in the room at the time and told her that she shouldn't bite, that it wasn't nice and she said "But grandma, I brushed my teeth."
Have a happy day!!!
loislane125@charter.net

Lilian said...

i LOVE LOVE the candy! here's a joke

what did the sushi say to the bee?

wassssuuupppp bee? (wasabe)

poooahahhaha :)

trulycanadiangirl said...

ok if you know anything about hutterites you'll catch on to this.

knock, knock.
Whos's there?

Luke

Luke Who?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Luke for the silver lining"

Kenna said...

What did the bra say to the hat?

You go on ahead and I'll support these 2.

I get a kick out of this joke for some reason. Thanks for all the beautiful inspiration! You have some beautiful artwork.

mkschulz@charter.net

Dana said...

What a fabulous blog Heidi! I will be retuning regularly for sure.

Here's my funny story: When we were in 9th grade, my best friend and I were babysitting for this very bright little girl about age 8. She started complaning that she was having pain and she kept rubbing her neck, throat and upper chest. When we asked her what was hurting she cried out, "My UTERUS hurts" with tears in her eyes. My BF and I were hysterical with laughter, seriously, we couldn't even breathe when we realized she meant her ESOPHAGUS! (She had been learning about some of her internal organs in school. Poor little girl, she just looked at us like we were nuts.

Thanks for making this fun, I hope I made you laugh!

Julie said...

Oh Heidi so many goodies!!! What a nice treat! I am soooo bad at these "leave a funny comment" ones, sometimes I can't even think of something to say . . . but I just overheard a conversation in the kitchen between my DH, my #1DD and my DS (just 2). My DD was saying to DH "Mommy lets me . . ." so my husband responded "Who's the boss here? I'm the boss!" It was then my adorable 2 yo DS piped up in his cute little baby voice, "Ethan's boss!" which he repeated several times much to my DH's amusement and surprise. His comment to me was "he's much smarter then I give him credit for! :)

Adelina said...

WOW! That would be some neat candy to win. Okay, so here's my story. It's not really funny as much as just cute. I have an 18 month old daughter who has taken on my personality - translation - she's really bossy! So when we arrive at her daycare it's usually breakfast time and she doesn't mess around. Well last week they were learning to shake hands. Her little friend comes up to her while she's eating and tells her "shake...Bella shake". Bella turns to her and shakes her little finger in her face and says "no, no, no!". I couldn't believe it.

Anonymous said...

Wow, way cool candy blog! And believe me you are on a pedestal!!!
The funny story I think of is from one Easter (church vigil service) when a granddaughter was maybe four years old. We were outside of the church for a procession, candle lighting etc, and the priest had forgotten something inside the church, so he ran back in to get it, well our granddaughter said "look mom, Jesus is running away!" We laughed (everyone laughed)so hard!!! I crave blog candy!!!
Ilene(iebyrne@yahoo.com)

Kim said...

Fantastic blog candy!

I've got a few good ones...Here's something that had my husband and I laughing so hard we were in tears. Better told in person but I'll give it a shot in writing.

I'm a stay-at-home mom with two small children. I also run an event management company, which at times is painfully busy. Of course, like most women, I'm forever swamped, running around like crazy trying to do twelve things at once. My husband is extremely helpful but, you know, he's still a man so he has his typical "man" moments like staring into a fridge and saying "I don't see the ketchup" when it's right in front of his face. Well one night a few weeks ago we're having dinner, my husband is finished with his food and is just sitting at the table. My three year old says "dad, what you tinkin' bout?" My husband replies, "oh I was thinking 1..2..1..2..1..2" My head shoots up and the first thing out of my mouth is "well, that explains a lot!" (Insert sarcasm) With this we both start cracking up and then I tell him, through laughing fits, that "I'm thinking about what the kids need to bring for lunch to the sitter's tomorrow, to remember to call the sitter to tell her they're coming over early, how much work I still need to do, the card I need to finish, that the office needs to be picked up...and you're sitting there thinking 1...2...1...2?" He replies, "well that's just what I was thinking at that moment." Yeah, and that's just what I was thinking at the same moment! I think this is a very clear view into the mind of a man...hee hee For days afterwards anytime he spaced about something, like emptying the trash and leaving the empty trash can sitting in the middle of the kitchen without a clean bag inserted (classic, he does this all the time, even though he has to walk past the empty can to do anything in the kitchen), I would simple mutter...1...2...1...2...

It was great to read everyone else's stories!!

Kim (ksdm@comcast.net)

~Lana B.~ said...

Wow, you are amazing Heidi! Great blog...check it often and w/ good reason...you rock!
My story has to do w/ my DH who argues w/ me constatntly that he does NOT have anger issues. A few years back our 65pound boxer dog got into our kitchen trash and ate a piece of garbage. My DH lost it at the dog. He told her (now picture this in your head)"If you want to pick through the garbage can then you must be a piece of trash!"...as he PICKED her UP and put all 65pounds of her IN TO the kitchen garbage can!!!! O the look on that poor dog's face! He will never live down actually putting the dog IN the garbage! LMBO!

Relating to some other moms...my DD dropped her snack one day, sat her little tush on the bottom stair step, look at me w/ oh-so-curious eyes, flipped her little hand in the air and said "What the F#@*!?" Try NOT to laugh and explain THAT to a 3 year old! OF course, now she is 14 yrs old and we have to explain it all over to her again! LOL
you can find me at mamastamps at sbcglobal dot net.
~Lana B.~

Gina Wrona said...

My funny story would have to be about when I asked my 12 year old son to let out our black lab, Ebony, who just turned 1 yr old on january 18th. We were all in our family room aka stampin' room, which is quite small (10 x 10) and I asked him to let her out, well before you know it she got so excited that somehow someway she was able to get underneath him and literally knock him off his feet landing on his but! Ker plunk! We all laughed so loud, even louder the more he kept saying "it's not funny".

ctbigreddog66@aol.com

3trikes said...

when my oldest was an only and gaining some independance, He announced that he would go down stairs and let me sleep longer. I smiled under my covers and responded "Okay Honey" which stopped him in his tracks, He informed me very seriously that his name is "JACK" and so I made an attempt to explain that sometimes we call someone that we love a special name like Sweetpea or Honey...he seemed to be considering it and then told me "I am Jack, I am NOT Yunch"
So we have since made an effort to reserve our favorite sandwich toppings for the Table.

Anonymous said...

Just the other day my middle (age 5)dd saw grandma and grandpa kissing, and she said ewww. They asked her if she ever saw mommy and daddy kissing and she replied, I wasn't there when they got married. Needless to say we need to show more affection to each other so people don't think we sleep in separate bedrooms.!!!
Anyways, thanks for the inspiration.
Carrie
maddan @ telus . net

Heather said...

What wonderful candy. I've been sitting here for a while trying to think of something funny I could share. I finally thought of something. This happened last month at our church. One of the speakers was at the podium talking and he started saying stuff like do you ________, do you ______, etc. I don't remember exactly what he was saying, I just remember they are things we shouldn't do, and he was using it as an example of what we shouldn't do, anyways, what he was saying isn't the point, when he was saying that my 2 year old daughter started yelling out "Yes, Yes, Yes" to each thing he said. We had to hurry and hush her up. It was terribly embarassing. I could hear the people around us chucking, and the worst part is that they weren't things we do. I have had several chuckles since then as has my husband.

Heather S.

tanis said...

If you're an avid movie watcher, then I hope you've watched Nacho Libre already...I don't know if that's your kind of humour, but I kill myself over Nacho's song about Incarnatia (sp??) every time I think of it. If you haven't seen this yet, I suggest you do!
That's all my cold virus brain can think of today.
Hope you're having a joyful day!
Tanis
gieser@mts.net

Mara said...

Love the blog candy!
Ok here is one:

What do peinguins use for napkins?



flapkins


eternalbeauty1975@yahoo.com

thanjks
thanks
Mara

Y said...

Well I think this is more cute than funny, but it cracks me up every time I think about it.

I have two younger brothers...one is 9 yrs younger and me other 8. When the middle guy was 2 or 3 (he was walking and sort of talking) the way he'd throw a tantrum is to sit back on his legs, cover his face and cry. We have a picture of him sitting on the grass, face covered crying.

Fast fwd about 15 years...during their graduation ceremony as grads walked up to the stage, they projected pics of them starting as kids and going up the years.

"Friends" of his came to ask me for pics and I couldn't help but hand that one over.

So on grad imagine a 17 yr old, 6' 2", sportsmen and Validictorian walking to give his speech and the last pic they flashed was this baby pic!!!

Students, parents and teachers were laughing so hard he had to stand there for at least 3 mins before he could start his speech.

It's a couple of years later, and i think i am still on his hit list. Of course posting thing on the net doesn't help...but hey anything for the awesome Candy!!!!

YM

Anonymous said...

My funny story is about my oldest daughter who was four at the time. It was Easter time and we were decorating Easter eggs and putting them in her Easter basket. I was telling her "The Easter bunny is going to come tonight and take your eggs and hide them. In the morning we'll get up and go hunt 'em!" She looked at me with the widest eyes and said "will we use a gun?"
It took me a couple of seconds to realize she thought we were going to hunt the bunny!

Holly
yungs@alltel.net

peggy lee said...

Wow! What a super treat! I had to go to my kids for a joke because I just went blank!!
Knock, knock...
who's there?
little ole lady...
little ole lady who?
Hey, I didn't know you could yodel!

Thanks for an awesome blog with awesome stuff and awesome candy! You're the best, Heidi!
peglegs93@yahoo.com

beiteversohumble said...

Well, reading all of these stories certainly brightened my day! I don't know if I can add anything as funny, but a couple of things come to mind.

When I was in labor for my first child, my husband, who worked in a hospital and certainly knew better, went to find the nurse to tell her I was ready for my episiotomy. The nurse kindly said, "I think you mean the epidural, don't you?"

The next one that comes to mind is just when cell phones were starting to become mainstream (yes, I'm old!) I went into a public restroom and sat down on the toilet. In the stall next to me the lady said, "Hi, how ya doin?" Wow, I thought. Very friendly. Tentatively, I said, "Fine." "Whatcha doin?" she said next. I was at a loss at that because of course I was peeing. What was I supposed to say? Then I realized that she was talking on her cell phone - not to me! How embarrassing! I waited until she left the rest room before I came out.
Kathy

Natasha said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Leah said...

I adore your creations! I just found your blog & am adding it to my favs. :) oh gosh, a funny story.. well my life is a funny story, as I'm a big klutz... and I like a lot of jokes too.
Why do elephants have trumks?
Because they would look funny with glove compartments.. he he he :)
I hope I made you smile! :D

Michelle said...

Oooohhhh, that blog candy looks yummy!!! I am not good at funny, so I have a store of two jokes I bring out for parties. Here is one: Question: Why are blond jokes so simple? Answer: So men can understand them.
I'm a strawberry blond, so when blond jokes were all the rage, I would hear them all the time. This was my comeback!

Anne Marie said...

OK, I have a wonderful funny about a conversation with my 14 yo daughter. We were driving home from an all-day shopping trip, and I was exhausted, a bit cranky, and starting to tune out her endless chatter. (I hate to admit it, but her vocal chords know no limits!) It's starting to get dark, and we have about an hour's drive home, and I'm listening to her talk about what she likes and doesn't like about every song on her MP3 player. All of a sudden she says, "Mom, what's Basic Tommy." Me: Huh? Basic Tommy? She: "No, I said Vasic Tommy." Me: HUH? Vasic Tommy? What on earth are you talking about? She: "Well I figure it has to do with botox because the billboard showed this old guy with a big smile on his face." Me, trying to keep the car from veering off the road I'm shaking so hard with laughter: Meg, that's v-a-s-e-c-t-o-m-y, not Vasic Tommy! OMG, she still didn't get it, but when she did we both started laughing. Now all I have to do is bring up the Basic Tommy story and we're doubled over with laughter. I cherish this story because it's just so nice to share something pleasant and funny with her because most of the time she's in the throes of teenage angst and mood swings that leave us all wondering what planet she came from!

Thanks for the fun,
Anne Marie, amgross@bigfoot.com

Anonymous said...

joke:
What type of cheese is not yours?
Nacho cheese!!

stampingbeth@yahoo.com

Stampin' Heather said...

I'll change it up a bit and go with a pic. I have a ton of funny pics of my dog. This is a pic of him with his E-collar sleeping in his "kitty" spot. He wouldn't even look at the camera from embarrassment. He had gotten stung by a bee and wouldn't stop licking the sting spot and licked all the hair off his back, hence the collar. And we have to put blankets on the backs of the couches so he can sleep up there.

http://i74.photobucket.com/albums/i280/purdue_aoii/sept003.jpg

I also have some pics of him dressed up like a hot dog, a vampire, and Santa.

Renée said...

I don't really have a funny story, but I do have a joke my hubby told me:

There was a new Christian that decided to go into ministry. While studying, he exclaimed with excitement! The professor came by and asked "What's so exciting?". The student replied with "I can't believe a river parted for people to walk through, talk about amazing!". The professor looked at him funnily and said "Well, at that time of the year, the Jordan River was only six inches deep". A little deflated, the new Christian continues to read and again exclaims with excitement. The prof heads over once again and says "Now what?". The student replies "Those Egyptians chasing rthe Israelites drowned in only 6 inches of water, while on horses and in chariots!"

I thought that was kind of cute!

Anonymous said...

The whole family was taking a trip to a church gathering and along with us were my in-laws. My in-laws are up in years...well, we had to make a pitstop cause the older people wanted to get a cup of coffee. Anyway, my Mother-in-law needed to use the restroom...as we sat there at the tables we saw her come out of the Men's Room. We asked her why she went into the Men's Room instead of the Ladies Room and she said she thought it looked kinda funny in there. We all laughed so hard...to this day we still joke about it and have a good laugh!!! TFS :o)

Cindy Coffman
cac1957@hotmail.com

Rose Ann said...

Well...I don't know if you'll find this funny, but I did.

I'm a big fan of Keith Urban, and most know that he and Nicole Kidman married last year. We were watching the Oscar's red carpet arrivals, and my 5-year old boy saw Nicole in her long red gown, shyly smiled and said: "I wish I could marry her, but I was too little and ran out of time."

I have some blog candy too. Come and play if you want. ;)

tracy k. said...

Hi Heidi -

I think this is a funny story. Today my 4 yo dd and I were cleaning out a closet and she said to me so excitedly "Momma, is this a surf board". Had to laugh because it was the ironing board she was referring to and she had no idea what it was. Tells you how much I iron! ;-) Your blog is awesome, I love what you're doing with Wild About You! Thanks for sharing. Tracy etrkinne@comcast.net

Anonymous said...

Hi, I love this idea! Love the blog candy too, how very generous of you!!!

Okay my five year old daughter who is in JK always makes me laugh. On the last day of school before March Break I picked her up and on our way home she asked what we were doing for March Break. I told her we had family coming down for the weekend and we were celebrating her *5th Birthday*. She said oh, because I told my teacher I was going to Florida on a plane with my family! I said why would you tell her that? She said well it was an accident I meant to say that I was sitting on my bed in my p.j's playing with my toys but Florida came out instead!!! lol... I just found this hilarious. So I dropped her off this morning and told her she has to tell her teacher the truth and say sorry!! Kids say the funniest things! Thanks :)

~Chantale L~